Stand by Debbie Williamson

One courageous woman shatters the chains of abuse that bound her family for generations and dares to brave the crippling memories of sexual abuse; shatter the illusions of denial; reveal her family s bitter legacy of violence; reach for healing and wholeness, and take her place on a path to forgiveness and peace. Replacing shame with hope, fear with truth, and shadows with light, Debbie Williamson shares her arduous journey to wellness. She did not choose this journey. At nine years old, she was a victim of sexual abuse. The hidden trauma of childhood rape often maps a life filled with destructive patterns and shame. Such was almost the case for Ms. Williamson. As a young woman struggling to repair her family, she finds the courage to take a STAND. Grasping for health because her life truly depends upon it, she uncovers and shatters her family s tragic tradition of violence. With focus and conviction, Debbie Williamson overcomes a lifetime of denial to heal herself and protect the next generation.

Excerpt from the book:

Introduction

The details of my suicide were planned right down to the final moment. I envisioned it clearly. On the appointed evening, I would drive home from work as usual, pick up speed, aim for the large oak tree that was near the shoulder of the road by my house and crash head on.

Everyone would believe it was an accident. My children would never know that I did it intentionally. I would be free at last. No more would I have to live my life.

That was my glorified version of how to step out of this life; it did not happen.

Instead, I swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills and went to bed one afternoon. I woke up in the emergency room drinking charcoal. My daughter had found me and called her dad to tell him she couldn’t wake me up.

After that event, the ultimate shame hovered over me like a swarm of bees. The constant buzzing relentlessly reminded me of what I had just done to my children.
Two days after I got home from the hospital I called a friend who recommended a self-help program. Two weeks later, I was on my way to Boise, Idaho for what turned out to be a life-saving event. From that point forward, I began to live my life. Do you ever wonder how you got to where you are in life? And then wondered why you made the choices you did? I’ve asked myself these questions most of my adult life. I finally figured it out for myself, and my story has a happy ending.

My story includes three generations of abominable abuse of the darkest variety: sexual, emotional, and mental. My story sheds light on the shadow side of the adult human who uses children to relieve his sexual appetites and need for power and domination over the innocent and helpless. But my story ends in triumph instead of despair.

Being raped and sexually abused as a child imprisoned me in a lifetime of emotional and mental anguish. Not only did I survive and triumph, I found great happiness. I want to share the how and why with you.

We all have a story to tell and I am hoping mine will make a difference to someone out there. It is my hope that you won’t feel alone or think of yourself as another tragic statistic who dreams of leaving by the back door of suicide as I once did.
Yes, I wrote this story to give you hope because it is an inspirational and triumphant coming-of-age memoir. I also wrote it for my children, that they may recognize the miracles that have been bestowed upon us and stopped this sickening cycle of abuse.


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